James Monroe

In the early 19th century, it was generally agreed upon that "James" was a good name for a President.  I guess because it was a system that had previously worked out reasonably well with kings.  Not every James makes a good President, and not every James makes a bad king, but as a rule of thumb it usually turns out halfway decent.

James Monroe was elected President in 1816.  He won easily, no one even tried to ACT surprised.  The only main fellow that tried to run against him was someone named Rufus King.  Had Rufus King won, he would have been immediately cemented as the most important "Rufus" in the history of time.  He obviously did not even come close to winning, though, meaning that the door is still open for someone ELSE to become the all-time most important "Rufus."  Unfortunately, no one has been stepping up lately.

"There will never be a King Rufus, but there always will technically have been a Rufus King."  - The unsubstantiated closure to his would-be inaugural address. 

Anyhoo, enough picking on failures for now, let's get back to Monroe.  He achieved some important accomplishments.  Most notably, the MONROE DOCTRINE.

!!!

(no photo available)

Ever wonder how Americans got to enjoy such good freedom and possess so many states?  Well let me tell you, we used to have WAY less (of both).   Nowadays, the U.S. is the world's greatest melting pot, at least figuratively.  We welcome good people from all nations and cultures and potentially even other planets.  Back in James Monroe times, however, European nations were not only unable to stop fighting amongst themselves, they wanted to come over to America to fight, too.  Since fighting is not peaceful and also Un-American, the President was not okay with that.  Europe also had its collective eyes on Central and South America.  Oh no no no, said James Monroe (rhyme time).  He made it CLEAR that they could not interFERE (oh yeah).  In other words, mind your own beeswax and STAY AWAY, Europe.  For ONCE.

They finally did, and were almost never heard from again.


James Monroe died on July 4, 1831, making him the 3rd out of 4 dead Presidents to expire on the 4th of July.  (Madison outlived him.)  Again, the 3rd out of 4 Presidents to die ON the 4th of July.  Which of course is, was, and always will be America's BIRTHday.  In the long run it turned out to just be a happy coincidence, but imagine how creeped out everybody must have been back then.  Especially the still-alive James Madison.  Every July 4th, "Oh no!  Today will be it!  Washington's ghost is gonna come an' GIT me!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Instead, he just died on a regular day like most people.  Not everybody is a popular freak like James Monroe.


 For more information, please click HERE.