The tiniest President, but NOT of insignificant importance! James Madison championed the BILL of RIGHTS, supervised the Louisiana Purchase, and was a key contributor to the Federalist Papers. In fact he wrote some of the very BEST Federalist Papers. Not all of them, though. Some of his friends wrote really good ones too, but there's no need to get competitive during a time of war.
I think it's safe to say that even though he was so small in stature, James Madison's professional accomplishments were impressive enough that they completely overwhelmed and eradicated any possible scrutiny of his height and weight. So let's do that now.
He was 5'4" and never weighed more than 100 pounds in his entire life. Imagine him standing next to George Washington, especially shirtless at the beach with girls around. It's well documented that they knew each other. Would Washington kick sand at him? "I cannot tell a lie, I kicked sand at James Madison."
In spite of being so small, he was good with girls. He successfully convinced Dolly Madison to MARRY him. (Did he get down on one knee? If so, could she tell? Har.)
Dolly Madison named herself "First Lady," which is still a thing, even now. She invented that, if you ever wondered. Contrary to popular rumor, however, she did NOT invent any mass-produced snack cakes. ("I cannot tell a lie, I did not invent Zingers.")
In the year 1812, James Madison decided to thrust America into the War of 1812. He felt the timing was right.
James Madison got real paranoid towards the end of his life. He was both going broke and becoming obsessed with his own legacy, compulsively tampering with many of the letters and documents he would ultimately leave behind. He is even rumored to have forged Thomas Jefferson's handwriting, which was easy to do because he could just copy it from the Declaration of Independence.
***FAKE DOCUMENT EXAMPLE***
(warning: not real)
Madison: Mr. Jefferson, am I the greatest President to date?
Jefferson: Yes Jammes Madison.
Madison: There's only one m in "James," Mr. Jefferson.
Jefferson: Oopps.
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